Batteries Are Not Included.

Engerlund!

2004-06-16T19:25:00.000+01:00

It's just been reported that one of the French football players has failed
a drugs and alcohol test on the Monday after the match. If this is
confirmed, under World Football Federation rules, paragraph 6 sub section 2e, France will forfeit their 3 points and they'll be appointed to their opponents, England.

Carlsberg don't make news reports, but if they did they'd probably be the best news reports in the world.

Did I Mention I'm Of French Origin?

2004-06-14T16:54:00.000+01:00

No, really! Bonjour, j'adore la Francais!

Ok, i can't do it, even if we're shite, "Keep St. George in my heart keep me English!"

Oh and can everyone stop jumping on the blame Heskey bandwagon please, the only place Gerrard should have been kicking the ball at that stage is into the stands.

Roll on Switzerland, if we lose we're out, great.

Pride. Passion. Belief.

2004-06-06T19:55:00.000+01:00

7 Days To Go.

He Kan Speel Wel.

2004-06-05T22:05:00.000+01:00

Congratulations to David Tidmarsh who won the 77th Annual Scripps National Spelling Bee. He beat 264 other spellers to claim the prize.
Below is a picture of the grand master speller aged just 14 and a list of the words he correctly spelt to claim the prize.

His interests include interests include astronomy, meteorology, photography, technology, and the supernatural.

phalanx
kiwi
ombrophilous
succenturiate
foudroyant
balancelle
ecdysis
politeia
serpiginous
sumpsimus
sophrosyne
arete
gaminerie
autochthonous

Buy It Now.

2004-06-03T23:44:00.000+01:00

Please. x

Shame On You Channel 4.

2004-05-31T16:40:00.000+01:00

They expect us to wait till autumn? How could they.

It's a shame there is nowhere to illegally download episodes of The OC. ~~http://www.suprnova.org/~~
We will just have to wait. ~~http://www.suprnova.org/~~

Will Hung.

2004-05-25T17:27:00.000+01:00

AWOL.

2004-05-23T19:17:00.000+01:00

Hello, if i go missing over the next few weeks it's be due to me being buried in books in preparation for the impending AS exams! :(

Spotted.

2004-05-20T21:06:00.000+01:00

Mr William Young filming on the coast. Look at him with his cute little hat, and blacked out ~~windows~~ goggles. To avoid the paparazzi perhaps?

Picture credit scott1723 FMForums.

Tonight.

2004-05-17T16:35:00.000+01:00

It's Coming.

2004-05-15T20:56:00.000+01:00

I have some exclusive caps of the latest Big Brother teaser advert for you all! In the advert you get a sneak peak into the house through little gaps in the Big Brother eye logo. As such it was hard to get clear pictures which weren't ruined by the presence of the logo, but hopefully they will tide you over!

I think these are bean bag type chairs. Very funky, if a little disturbing.

No, i have no clue as to what this is either, but it could be the key to the whole series. Or not.

Look, you can see the funky/distubning chairs in the background! And some sort of bridge across the living room, could that be shark infested waters beneath it, or just a blue carpet? I guess we'll have to wait and see.

Our thirsts for the goings on in the house will be quenched over the course of the series by a number of these babys!

Friday 28th May 2003 10:00pm- Where will you be?

For Lee's Sake.

2004-05-15T13:44:00.001+01:00

http://www.freedanhunter.com/

Hurrah For Harman & Hunter!

2004-05-13T19:15:00.000+01:00

Did you manage to sit through the extremely long Soap Awards last night? No, me either. But did manage to watch for long enough to see Mr Harman collect sexiest male (and best newcomer), and there's no other more deserving. Apart from maybe Scott from Emmerdale.

And i was also pleased to see Alex Carter aka Lee in Hollyoaks pick up an award for the best comedy character. From what i've seen of him out of character he doesn't have to act much on the show, Alex is Lee! He's a Oldham season ticket holder as well, ~~poor~~ lucky thing, i have seen him in the club shop before a game once.

Oh and here is a picture of the lovely Scott (Ben Freeman) for good measure.

Something Quite Surreal.

2004-05-11T20:24:00.000+01:00

As i was walking home from school today a man stepped out of his driveway with his ferret following him. Yes that is correct he was taking his ferret for a walk.

Said ferret then ran out infront of me, causing me to stop quickly and, as my shoes are loose, one came off and i stood on the side of it and fell over.

The runaway ferret then made its way onto the road causing a middle-aged learner driver to have to slam her brakes on, which in turn caused a lorry carrying traffic lights to bump into the back of her.

A ferret.

Like i said, very surreal.

A New Breed Of Bitch.

2004-05-11T20:13:00.000+01:00

Just when i thought no-one could replace the uber bitchy Shell Dockley in steps Natalie Buxton.

She's tons cleverer, and even more manipulative. I loved the way that with the help of a few essential oils and a sliced hand she turned everyone from calling her a nonce to cheering her on. Genius.

And just as you thought Bad Girls couldn't get any better, we get three episodes next week as Tanya Turner enters the prison. I am so friggin' excited, i love Tanya more than is healthy. I wish i could just sleep for a week and wake up at 9pm on Monday.

In Search Of Sazzquatch (Dedicated To Jonny)

2004-05-10T18:55:00.000+01:00

There were some scientists
Tryin' to figure out the sasquatch riddle
Then they figured out it was a missing link

"In search of Sazzquatch" - That was a kick ass "In search of.."
With Leonard nimoy kicking out the jams Hauwww

He captured imaginations of people all around the globe
His name was Sazzquatch so I am told

His legend's ancient in the ancient scribe
Of the Indian tribe (apache tribe)

Scientists have proven that the Sazzquatch he is real
Take a look at the plaster cast of his foot now you know he's real
Listen real close to the audio tape not human now you know he's real
Couldn't be a man in gorilla suit so fuckin' way now you know he's real
Real real real-real real real really-real real

Dischordant solo with overpoering drums

Jonny: Don't take this personally, cause it's not about your playing
Sazz: No Dude, your drumming is kick-ass. It's just that "the D" it's always just been me and Jonny
Jonny: And we're just not comfortable beeing a power trio. I hope there'e no hard feelings

(Brief semi-classical guitar interlude)

(Sung)
Jonny: Sazzquatch (Sazz: Sazzquatch)
Both: We know your legend's real
Jonny: Sazzquatch (Sazz: Sazzquatch)
Both: We know your love is real
Jonny: Sazzq-oh-uh-eww-ahh-atch (Sazz: Sazzquatch)

Both: You and Tenacious D... are... real (Really stretch "real")

(Applause)

Sazzquatch: Tell Tenacious D "They were kick-ass"
Guy: And who should I tell them said that
Sazzquatch: Tell them it was Sazzqua- Tell them it was a friend.
Guy: OK

(Audience din)
Classical music plays serenely over sasquatch's walking and moaning
Jonny: Hey (Really stretched)
Classical music abruptly ends

Sazzquatch: You know what... you better tell them it was Sazzquatch. They won't know what friend you're talking about.
Guy: Ok, Sure.
Sazzquatch: See ya.

And incase you're interested you can visit Jonny's site by clicking here or on the link in the links section on the right!

How We Got Our Name.

2004-05-09T12:00:00.000+01:00

I promised myself i wouldn't use the collective 'we' in my blog, but i've not even had it a full day and it has already made an appearance. Grrrr. I can see how easy it is to slip in though, but i can assure you there's only one Sazz updating this blog isn't there Sazz? Yes Sazz.
Anyway, onto the ~~not very~~ exciting story of how 'we' got our name.

Well originally i wanted 'It's Just A Phase' but unfortunately this was taken.
I was struggling for name ideas, but i had an idea of how to find one. I ventured onto http://www.bet365.com/ and clicked on the Horse Racing section and had a look at the names of the horses racing (yesterday). Horses always have cool names, like Rooster Booster and Jurancon II. Unfortunately i couldn't find a name that i felt i wanted, so this time i went to Google and searched for 'Horse Names' upon which i came across This brilliant website, with trillians of horse names listed alphabetically.
I went through the whole alphabet and made a shortlist of names, eventually i got it down to Batteries Not Included and Destined To Dream. I thought about my decison ~~for not very long~~ carefully, and decided on Batteries Not Included. Unfortunately this was taken so i just added an 'are' to it and hurrah, Batteries Are Not Included was born.

I'm sure you will all sleep easily tonight knowing this piece of information.

S x

Mr Harman Mousemat.

2004-05-08T16:28:00.000+01:00

I bought myself a yummy Nigel Harman mousemat from eBay t'other day and it arrived today. Although it was addressed to my Dad for some strange reason.

Here is a picture of the mousemat in question:

You can get hold of your own yummy Dennis/Nigel items by clicking here or here.

Some of the names of the items are quite inspired:

NIGEL HARMAN - DENNIS EASTENDERS "DIRRTY DOG" MAGNET

NIGEL HARMAN - DENNIS EASTENDERS "DELICIOUSSSSSSS" PEN

NIGEL HARMAN - DENNIS EASTENDERS "CHEEKY BOY" KEYRING

S x

All Aboard The Bandwagon.

2004-05-08T16:05:00.000+01:00

Well everyone and their uncle has one of these blog things, so i thought i'd see what the fuss is about and invest in my own. It will probably be a bit shit.

Apologies In Advance as i will most likely update this a few times and then never come back again. I easily lose my concentration.

S x